walking makes you feel like you're 80

no offense to the 80 year olds out there.

i had high hopes i would awake this morning to a pain-free hip and i would blissfully run at least 6 miles, my first full loop of central park. as you may have guessed by the title of the post, that's not exactly how it went.

i woke up and the hip was twingy (pronounced "twin-jee"). not too sharp of a pain, but definitely not all better. not hurting enough to skip practice though so off i went.

i got their early enough to ask the coach about my hip. today it was the "rookie" as ramon has affectionately named him (all the other coaches and a mentor or two are doing this crazy 200 mile relay race up in new hampshire this weekend). he said he was pretty sure that it was indeed the i.t. band, that it was probably enflamed and that when that happens, it takes a while for it to go back down. he recommended icing it and lots of stretching and if it was still trouble after a week or so we'd talk about it again.

okay, cool, except we were supposed to run 6 - 8 miles today and i didn't know how that was going to go. the thing that is insane is that i actually was thinking okay well, if we do the outer loop, if i'm feeling okay i can do a lower one after and that will be 1.7 for a 7.7 total. that would not be bad.

charlotte arrived and it was time to go. the park was packed today - there was a training run for the nyc marathon through road runners and everyone was out. it was a little claustrophobic but good people watching. i told charlotte if she wanted to leave me she could because i was going to be a slow poke, but she was okay with that.

we ran to just before the 102 transverse, and i had to walk. the dull pains had become sharp ones, and i could feel other parts of my body starting to compensate - my lower back started to hurt and the quad of my right leg. i could tell i was running a little weird and so...tried to walk it off. charlotte kept me company, and after a little while, i decided to try again. i probably should have taken the 102 across and planned on 4, but you know me. tough girl.

we ran most of the way down the hill, and then my hip was done. i was pissed. at who? the world. well the world except for charlotte. i hated that i was not going to run today. that i was hurt. that there wasn't much that i could do about it. char was great, keeping me company and offering suggestions of stretches and reminding me that it was better to stop and not hurt myself more. ~grumble~

a little after 102, char went on to run the rest of the miles, which was probably good because i was getting grumpier by the minute. as much as my hip hurt, the bruising to my ego and confidence hurt more. this was aggrivated by the all the other runners galloping past me. i wanted to trip them. of course i didn't and wouldn't but i'd be lying if i said the thought didn't cross my mind. especially the ones that were chipper and looked extra comfortable in their running skin. i was terribly and horribly jealous. the worst part was when the large training or pacing groups would suddenly just envelop me, and i'd be surrounded on both sides by sweaty, chatty, happy runners. i really felt like i was 80 - all i needed was a cane. who's the biggest loser? um, yeah, that would be me.

i finally made it back and char was there talking to the coach, i knew she was worried. it's nice to have people worried about you :) he said that it was good that i listened to my body, and that i shouldn't be discouraged because it's very early in the season. i should keep the general mileage i've been doing, but if running was hurting so much that i was compensating to do some other sort of activity. technically we only have to be running three times a week - i've been doing four. so what i may do is switch one of my run days to a cross training day and do two of those. yoga needs to be a part of my routine because it stretches and strengthens, and an ice pack would be my new friend.

i know that no one is harder on me than me, but i'm just super disappointed in myself, ridiculous or not. yes, i know i have an injury, but maybe it's because i didn't stretch enough? maybe i should have been doing more cross training? maybe i ran too hard on wednesday? maybe maybe maybe. and of course the worst thought of all - maybe i was crazy to think i could do this?

today's mileage: 5.0
total mileage: 81.5